Unforgettable November 2009

This month has been a month in my personal walk with God that I will never forget. It has been one of the hardest months of my life, yet it has been one of the most freeing and rewarding months of my life. God began to show me at the end of October that there were several issues that I had deep within my heart that I had to feel, to express, to deal with, and to let go of. Through every single step and in every moment God was with me in this journey. God spoke to my heart and whispered that He wanted everything in November; HE wanted to BE everything to me this November, and He wanted all of Sarah this month. I surrendered not fully knowing what I was about to walk into but knowing that deep healing from my past needed to take place that had me in bondage for many years, and God was the only One who understood it all. He asked me to let go of everything, and I mean everything for 30 days... ANY involvement with the youth at Lyndhurst Baptist Church, girl's Bible study, caffeine, make up, home cell group, relationships, communication, music, other books.

God taught me that He IS more than enough for me; He IS big enough to heal me. He IS "God" enough!! He showed me what true unconditional love is and what it means to trust. He held my heart very gently as I walked a journey from the very beginning of my life to today looking at issues, circumstances and memories that had become my identity and had affected my relationship with God and how I relate to others. God peeled back layers of hurt, anger, doubt, worry, and fear that I had built up around my heart for many years in an effort to protect anyone from getting too close to me and that I had used as response mechanisms in dealing with my past. I experienced what people mean when they say "minute by minute reliance on God." God was my strength and got me through literally each minute on those very difficult days when everything that I had come to rely on and run to had been taken out from under me. God showed me that He uses everything we go through to bring Him glory and to bring others to himself. I know this will be a continued process for me as I take steps each day toward healing, restoration, freedom, and liberty, but the end of November marked a new beginning for Sarah Maddox because I have found who I am in Christ; I have found freedom in being who He created me to be, and I have learned that He (without anyone or anything else) IS more than enough for me!

Psalm 18:20-24 (The Message)
"God made my life complete when I placed all the pieces before him. When I got my act together, he gave me a fresh start. Now I'm alert to God's ways; I don't take God for granted. Every day I review the ways he works; I try not to miss a trick. I feel put back together, and I'm watching my step. God rewrote the text of my life when I opened the book of my heart to his eyes."

John 8:36
"So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed."